For the Better Tomorrow

The fake

2011-10-10T05:50:00.000-07:00

Oh damned so many people hailing Steve Jobs as though he's god. On the other hand the anti Jobs people can't wait to find all the faults he has but wait, I'm neither. I'm only happy enough he's there to start pixar last time so i can enjoy animated films like Toy Story.

I can't believe what i see when iphone 4S get to see its first light. There were like 60% negative posts about it and people flaming the product on Facebook. The next day when Jobs' soul is released from the restrain of his human shell, the very people who flamed the product which he would rather market himself turned into "Angels" that "mourned his passing" posting comments saying as though they knew him in person. At least I know who are the hypocrites now.

The detour?

2011-09-14T09:33:00.000-07:00

Today I went for a jog on the route which runs from Yew Tee to Jalan Teck Whye. On the way, at Pioneer JC, I met Wei Hao again jogging in the opposite direction. Quite the coincidence I say, for my second time jogging around the neighborhood. Wei Hao then decided to change his course and jog with me to Jalan Teck Whye.

I'm kind of grateful for having met him on the way as it had made my journey to the end point more entertaining with someone beside. However, I had some errands to run after reaching the end point and had to split off with him. It was to buy oolong tea for a friend and there I was, thinking maybe I will be able to get it from the Sheng Siong supermarket at 10 mile junction only to find out the whole place is under revamp and there's no more Sheng Siong over there.

Next, in my bid to find tea, I jog over to ITE Choa Chu Kang Shop & Save but to no avail. Following that, I decided to ask mum where the nearest supermarket is and gave her a call. She told me it's at Teck Whye avenue and that she would meet up with me there. With that, I took yet another detour to the meeting point.

With that, I wonder how far I had ran and all but hey it's not too far I guess. Hopefully, there's no need for such a day with so many detours again.

Concert?

2011-08-27T07:21:00.000-07:00

Hmm today I went to the akb 48's 4th stage concert with Vincent. My ears got blasted but still working. Got hooked to one of the songs. While the chorus of some songs are quite catchy. Still, it's hard for me to get hooked to songs. Maybe i'll listen MAYBE?

Overall, I did enjoy myself. How I rate. It's an 8. but the "high" rating is not high for me. I wasn't really high though. If I get high on the next potential concert, I'll rate the performance 9+. Heh heh. After all, watching people performing with all they've got is something to behold. Especially it's something they enjoy. I can feel the energy but still, the energy couldn't reach out to the crazy one inside me.

New life?

2011-08-24T22:02:00.000-07:00

Well blogging again may be good. It lets me express myself. Let's talk about 2 days ago. After lesson I had dinner with Wei Liang and Benjamin. Hm it was quite enjoyable seeing their funny squabbles.

I ended up going home later than I wanted. Never regretted one bit. It's something I feel could be what's missing from my life. Talking with people. Mum doesn't stay home much. Talking with buddies lighten the heart too.

Hello again

2011-08-22T12:12:00.000-07:00

My world has once again started. The reason for the 2 year lag was because of my national service. I told myself there would not be one day I would post about army or during army time unless it's ending. Which is about now. heh heh see you again.

Why 2

2009-09-10T23:19:00.000-07:00

Remember the last time i asked why there's more right handers than left handers?

Well after searching a bit i found something which said,

"The human brain is divided in two halfs, the right one is responsible for everything we do with our LEFT side, and the left half for everything we do with our RIGHT side.
And the two halfs have different tasks. The right one is the creative part of our brain (center of talents in music and art, for example), while the left one is the center of speech, learning, mathematic skills etc. So the center of speech is in the half which is also responsible for the right side of our body, and that's the reason why there are more right-handed people."

That said. Most of the time we learn how to speak when we are babies. That worked more of our left brain which governs more of the right half of our body. That is why there's more right handers. We humans had been training our left brain since young.

123... 321...

2009-08-28T10:47:00.000-07:00

Recently I see the revival of the pro yo-yo craze.

Yes it's good to see some old craze get revived again it sure reminds me of the old times when I was 8-9 years old.

Before super yo-yo anime got shown in Singapore, there was sale of Pro-yo and television made good advertisements. So much so young kids like me and my sis had mum bought each of us one.

Then came the golden age of my elder bro playing yo-yo at home since he borrowed my sis's yo-yo and had fun with it.

He did loop-the-loop. Around-the-world and many other nice moves.
However, there was once... my bro was on this yo-yo practice spree that he did around-the-world 3 times i was counting "1... 2... 3..." And on the third time... The yo-yo hit the ceiling light which has no cover(the cover was spoiled) when for an instance... time slowed down for me and i counted "3... 2... 1..." PLIANG!!! the ring neon light dropped on the floor and got smashed...

That was the last time i ever saw my bro played with yo-yo... Good luck to anyone i know who plays yo-yo at home. 123... 321... BOOM!

Power Ranger!!!!

2009-08-19T01:38:00.000-07:00

Yes one of my childhood heroes. Without them, there would be a me without passion, without hope.

I can still remember myself screaming, "GO! GO ! POWER RANGERS!!!". Then played with my friends in school calling myself the blue ranger Billy.

Then when I got my first megazord, I started showing off. Those were the times... To bring my new toys out so everyone can play. Other than in school.

Then today I was got bored and decided to make a video with a plushie

I went. OPERATION OVERDRIVE!!! and here's the result...

Imagine the flat one as a ranger who hasn't morphed. Then the Pooh as a morphed Power Ranger.

What a parody heh heh... Call This Budget Power Ranger

Why?

2009-08-18T03:32:00.000-07:00

Recently, I have yet again started asking thousands to millions of whys in my head.

Why is the sky blue?
Why birds can fly?
Why electricity can power many things up but never power me up...
(Okay... maybe my brain does utilize electricity in small volts.
Never mind that.)
Why Mickey Mouse is so popular?

Why Why Why???

There is another word which is closely related to why. That is 'HOW'

I shall cover that next time.

Today i feel like asking something...

Why are there more right-handers than left-handers in this world?

Bummer

2009-07-01T18:48:00.000-07:00

Recently... My cellphone is malfunctioned. What happened? Oh yes, lets just say my voice can't reach the other party if i call someone and same thing if the other party calls me.

The stupid thing now is. This morning, i received a call when i was having a "shitting session"... Turns out, its a private number. Now now... HOW THE HECK AM I GOING TO RETURN CALLS TO A PRIVATE NUMBER !#!@$%%$%^$

And even worse... Even if i answer a call with private number now, I won't know who that person is unless he or she keep shouting his or her name non-stop 5 times for me to listen and call back. Reason is simple... The caller cannot hear me saying "hey who are you?" since my phone has gone haywire...... My life is good but, I keep getting these ridiculous things happening to me.

Yes man, Ok man, Sleep man

2009-06-14T08:03:00.001-07:00

Recently, I just can't seem to sleep at night. I don't know why. This has affected me significantly. Especially the way I had presented myself to my friends. Let's state an example. On Saturday, the day before today, I was on the way to meet Shai and Kai Xiang to Suntec for the IT show. When Kai Xiang called me to change the meeting place, I let said out things I wished i didn't but i did.

The usual me would go, "Ok man lets meet you there."

Something that wasn't me just came out.

Before I came home, I was helping out at the National Poomsae Competition(Pattern Competition). Let's just say i got pissed again. So much so. When I was taking a short break, closing my eyes. Only to have someone blowing on my head. The next image that came into my mind wasn't what I had expected. It was me imagining myself strangling whoever that was doing blowing at me.

I don't know what I did but i did manage to stop that impulse of imagination from turning to reality. This was actually something that had accumulated with weeks of not being able to sleep normally and to work whole day staring at one stupid computer screen without much rest.

Some may say. "Heh you're just asking for reward indirectly."

I say i simply need a freaking rest. Let me shut my eyes for 30mins to 1hour. That will be great. But the thing is i'm always keeping the, "NO I can't work anymore phrase" to myself. Never mind that, i was already showing signs of fatigue. Hinting that i need a replacement. No I got none. In the end it was those who were not so close to me that got what I meant and asked for me to rest. Now where did my friends go?

Oh lets forget about that. Probably be hearing things like "Hey I have competition, cannot help" Oh alright. I believe that for night time but what about during the day? When they had lots of free time laughing up there while i had to work my guts out. Will 30 mins to 1 hour of temporary replacement for me be too long? Went home only to found out i forgot to pass grading related items and the fee to Mr Lee. Heh looks like i'm just not meant to go for grading same as the fact I'm not meant to be a referee

Maybe I can blame myself for not asking but i'm just not used to... The funny thing is, when people ask me to do things. I say yes without a doubt just like for today's helping at the Nationals.

Never mind that. This sure brings some things back to Friday. I asked for help with teaching of basics to new members. No one answered the called quickly, Instead, i had people helping half-heartedly which ends up having Mr Tan taking the job. Sure training for competition. And they get to train every Friday. Sure Sure. I do sound unreasonable but sometimes, just a little rest or even helping me won't hurt right?

What the Heck?!?!

2009-06-07T08:24:00.000-07:00

Woo went to ChangKat to training on Friday(05 June 2009). Everything was as normal. Until i went acting professional and climb the pole support for the basketball hoop. Next, my slippers snap, break and i had to go home barefooted.(好丢脸啊）

Next on the following day, I went to Elias to help out again. Tried to get the new member to fit into the white belt class... She did not want to... Oh boy. i shall get help from Mr Lee next week heh heh.

More gaming to come and part time jobs in the days to come. For the Better Tomorrow!!!

Tone, phrasing and temper.

2009-03-23T08:07:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when we think about it. The way people behave in front of others matters a lot. Not only does they leave a form of impression in those around us. It also affects their willingness to help us in doing some things.

Take my younger sister for example. In the old times when she usually asked for things in a bad/lousy tone(e.g. ask mummy cook up instant noodles which taste superb with her excellent culinary skills) . The answer from mummy would be no most of the time. Then my sister would go into a foul mood and be a bad person using bad phrases. No vulgarities though... Just phrases that sounded bad. However, that would only lead to mummy less likely to prepare anything for her.

Something funny happened today. "Uncle"(Or my so-called step-dad) actually helped her in preparing the instant noodles instead because she is better in her tone and phrasing. (Or maybe she has already grasp a little bit of the ART OF "SAJIAO" which i usually use on mummy EFFECTIVE I SAY) If she keeps up with this good temper and tone. I think my sister's life would be happier most of the time. Even if mummy sometimes say no to preparing cos of the fact that mummy is lazy or something

These days...

2009-03-02T02:47:00.000-08:00

Had a fight in the Taekwondo IVP competition held on Sunday (1st MArch 2009). I had to say. The feeling of the fight was different from that of when i had my first fight during the Inter CC held years ago. My mind was clear. Maybe too clear... The first two rounds were somewhat ok when my arms got pummeled by the opponent's kicks. I felt nothing as my mind was more concentrated on the fight. However, when the fight reached the sudden death round.

MY mind "woke up" and pain started coming as though a tsunami or pain swept through my arms. Then came the consecutive kicks fsrom my opponent which caused even more pain which led to my mind "freezing up". I could not move my body even when I wanted with all I to move it. Lost in the end...

But HAHA the fight felt good enough as it was the firt time i ever got the condition of "body freeze" interesting feeling I say.

Although the fight felt good(For many other reasons i don't know). The pain kept getting more and more unbearable(Well this calls for more arm training) until felt that i simply wantded to sleep away the pain.

Next came today. When mummy got to know about the injuries, I can see tears in her eyes that she tried very hard to hold back. My mother, who have not beaten me ever since the start of my secondary school life. Was feeling heartache.

Feeling bad. I could only think up of jokes and keep doing funny actions to amuse her and to keep her mind away from those injuries i have.

My resolution: If i ever want to join any tkd compy again, i have to train hard to minimize chances of suffering from those injuries again.

Training

2009-01-10T19:40:00.000-08:00

Trained a little bit yesterday and almost kana an outward crescent from Zi Bing. Whoaaaaa!!!!. I will remember this and 'exact revenge on you ZB' lol

Whack-a-mole

2009-01-08T07:03:00.000-08:00

Today I played Left for dead with Zhi Guang, Khang Lip, and Eng Hoe.

I was in front of the team.
Finding route.
Next climbed out of a manhole.
Saw a Tank.
Informed the team and ran.
Tank went berserk rush to manhole.
Eng Hoe popped out of manhole.
Tank Whack him(WHACK-A-HOE)

C-L-A-S-S-I-C

Things that happen

2009-01-05T02:48:00.000-08:00

Recently, there's Taekwondo grading on 2 days and 2 places. What I am more proud of was the one which took place at Concord Primary. It was the first time I ever heard students there did very well.

It sure feels good to know that they are improving.

These sure are good news and event to greet the new year.

Well. If anyone were to ask me what's my resolution for new year.

I say lets take one step at a time and do what must be done with the time comes. The reason is simple. Keep things simple. That's what i will always try to do. Unless my mind wanders off the path of simplicity.

Had breakfast today and met Mr Andrew. Had a short talk and we both agreed. That we should think and do things simple. Only use the more complex approach when the need arises.

That is all i guess...

Things that happen/Things to do

2008-10-18T09:47:00.000-07:00

Most recent self-hurting action: A smack on forehead
Most recent vulgarity: F***
Most recent Course attending: NCAP Level 1 Coaching course
Most recent game I hope to buy: Dead Space
Most recent thing I want to finish quickly: Finish DOA Practical Week 2 & 3

Heh Heh. Smacks on forehead is usually done when someone does "shit" things in front of me. It is usually followed by the recent vulgarity when i am with my poly friends. Don't worry people its not with people i hate. "Shit happens" when you hang out with people who crap the heck out of you.

For the course. Hmm I am current attending this course to become a coach in Singapore. For the better tomrrow?

Yes yes dead space. My once in awhile violent game. Not for the young I say. Too much violence is bad. Some violence readies my mind to handle disgusting things/happenings so i won't faint at the sight of one.

FYI people. Do not think of DOA as Dead Or Alive. I know there will be many "stupid" or freaking crap minded people will ask me funny question about it being the game. Its not. DOA for my course is Developing Office Applications. Very good I say as once i finish one week's practical i can skip that week's practical lesson. What a deal for being hardworking.

I have to say i am a lucky person. If I can skip the practical session, I can go for Regent's taekwondo lesson. Let my mood decide on that, since I work with feelings no feel = rot at home and sleep. heh heh

This is a deciding semester for me. Time to get serious and do things with caution. I am also quite lucky. The days with lessons that end late have changed to end early. What a sem. Lets have a wonderful final semester in poly.

exhaustion

2008-10-04T08:13:00.000-07:00

Somehow i feel like quitting and taking a break from everything... Live a life normal eh...

Random Rant

2008-09-29T00:32:00.000-07:00

Some times I question the gift of a mouth guard to me was nothing but an act of redundancy. Why? I am said to be more suited to do something other than sparring they said. Sometimes i wish people around me to stop telling me what "I cannot do" and instead, tell me what "mistakes i made" so i can change. Telling me that I am not suited for something does not solve anything. Telling me what I did wrong helps more. Why? Simply because i like to try things and I tend to make mistakes more than anyone. Not on purpose but naturally. I have accepted the fact i have to take on something but please don't tell me i cannot do something. I really do wish to learn more. Humans do know how to do and say things do make people give up eh. That only makes me want to do things they want to give up more. As they said. Humans contradict themselves. I as one like to do it. The more the prevent me from doing something. The more I want to do it. Why? t is part of human nature.

Brothers

2008-09-07T07:15:00.000-07:00

After reading Naruto Book 43. Tears almost came ut of my eyes. I held them back. It showed deep lover between two brothers. How the older brother had always set good example for the younger one. How the older one kept protecting the younger one...

In my life. I only enjoy shows which shows brotherhood. On of which is the Sunday night drama about the Yang Family and their heroic acts.

To commemorate this post. I shall show the pictures of me and some of my brothers.

Wait... What is he pointing behind my back? They say we look alike.

I say NO. It can never be.

The fat one is my younger brother.

Hey why is he here? This is a picture of my nephew. A free gift for today's post.

My friends.

2008-08-26T19:21:00.000-07:00

There was once I read a friend's blog. He was doing this brief description of all friends he had. Well to be precise, most friends. Next, I saw this.

jinhao - his mind, you dont wanna know how he does things at times.

People am I really like that?!?! Well... Who knows eh.

Due to a litle of boredom I have, I decided to do something similar but with a little of my friends only. Why? Cos I'm lazy. Here goes:

Brother-->
Ray: As close as brother a brother to me. So close, some people think we are gay. PUI. We do have the young boy look although he does look younger.

The clique-->
Zhi Guang: Always with those freaking unpredictable thoughts whirling inside his head. One of those guys that people say we look alike. We do talk games a lot. Mostly the mind of the clique

Eng Hoe: With his freaking fast speaking speed. One can only wonder what he's saying. His accent is top-notch when it comes to having a funny one. Another joker and another good guy. We can count on him to do funny things at times.

Boon Teck: He is so innocent and good. You cannot find bad inside him. He is also gullible to a certain extent. Everyone in the clique likes him well enough.

Wei Liang: We started knowing each other more by playing Dota. Funny how different games bring different people together. He likes Boon Teck's presence and usually hang out with Boon Teck.

TKD Friends-->
Hongsheng(No space leh! See? I remember): He is so good at being bastard. People can say Tony Stark/Ironman learnt from him on how to be a bastard. Still, he nevers brings it too far and in short, is a good person.

Sin Yu: Give him the honours of making goofy faces. Although I got sick of them.(BLEAH! Com and get me then.) He sure do likes to "humiliate" me by showing my old photographs. I feel so violated... I do not get why he likes doing so. Don't tell me...(The remaining parts were censored away...) I feel so bad saying that. LOL

Derrick: He learns things fast. Thats all i have to say. Especially in the way of bastardism.(No wonder they say it is easy to fall to the darkness than to climb towards the light.) He does good academically and is a good person. Humble can be a word used to describe him.

The end

Now now. What happened to the other names? Cos those people either MIAed from my sights, Came back recently or lastly, I am lazy to write about them. Thats all eh?

Whines and Rants

2008-08-26T03:31:00.000-07:00

Some how, i whine and complain a lot. However usually after that. I do something about it.

Bredom hits once more.

2008-08-21T21:21:00.000-07:00

Life is getting boring.
Nothing is interesting.
I do not get surprised easily now other than some unexpected reactions I get from people when I do my usual sarcastic acts on them.

Boredom hits.

2008-08-20T18:20:00.000-07:00

Ever wonder how I get bored even though i get to game quite a lot these days? Its the way i can finish games longest in 4 days and fastest in 2-3 days. Some how either the games end too fast or I rush them too fast. It made me think that I have bought the wrong console for gaming. The fun is there. The story is there. However, the length is not there. The games are finished so fast. People can give me one day and I can rush it finish.

Now i have to spend more on games. 70+ dollars on one and one cannot even last me long enough.

To hell with online competitive gameplay for Singapore internet speed is still inferior compared to those in the west. I simply log online and i can see myself lag and get disconnected...

Hunter

2008-08-13T22:19:00.000-07:00

I set my sights.
I set my target.
I dream my wishes.
I dream my desires.
I fire my gun and
I fire up my passion.
With my aim that is true will target be through.
Yet nothing was done and nothing was accomplished.
I have done nothing made my dreams all false.
I held the gun and my hand shook.
My hand shook which made my aim blur
To ease the shaking, calm i must be.
For thinking with mind that's clear.
Will my sights be focused.

Rain. Work life.

2008-08-12T03:21:00.000-07:00

It been days since I started work. The only bad thing is the long trip home.

I met a kind soul today. It was raining. While I was waiting for a bus at the usual bus stop. This army man walked out from the bunch of trees behind the bus stop. Soon after he took shade at the bus stop. He flagged for taxi. One taxi went by ignoring him as it was already with a passenger. The second taxi came and he flagged it over successfully.

Next he asked me whether i was going to Jurong Point. I said yes and he asked me along. Today's trip home was faster by 20 minutes. HOSEH!!!

The Fan

2008-07-29T08:05:00.000-07:00

Fan spoil... Keep making sharp creaking sound.
Sharp Creaking sound... Cannot sleep more than three hours (No sleeping pass first stage sleep)

Turn off fan... Room hot...
Room Hot... Cannot sleep more than three hours (No sleeping pass first stage sleep)

No turning on of air-con... Why?
Turn on Air-con = Running nose for one week. No way!!!

Conclusion... Sleep without fan and Air con. Sleep 3 hrs wake up sleep again. Then sleep 3 hours wake up... Sleep again. What life.

More responsibilities

2008-07-27T05:13:00.000-07:00

Simple life today.
Went to City Plaza to find Father.
Then to Mountbatten CC to help out.
End of lesson Mr Tan said something, "We have reach a decision and want you to handle _____"

Hmm more things to handle. I never said no. However, i never said yes.
Still, My head tells me I have to handle. There we have it. More things to do for the one year duration I have. More challenges eh.

They should put me in first place for the title, "One who cannot ignore and reject a request" lol.

I hate Orchard Road

2008-07-22T03:03:00.000-07:00

Many people i know must heard of this song before:

Purple light, in the valley.
That is where, I wanna be.
With my friends, and fellow companions.
With my body and my gun and me~

Now here is my version to show why I hate Orchard road:

Pretty lights, in Orchard Road.
I walked there, with my friends.
With big crowds, we walked slow.
Then a bird shit drop down on my head~

Utterly flatten

2008-07-19T09:10:00.000-07:00

RAAAWWWRRRR!!!. Yes time to let out some things people. Wherever I go i either handle new members or white belts. Very nice? And when i complain a bit they ask me take brown one. Nice people. I rather not take any Bleah!!! :P

Concord: Jin Hao Ni(you) take white belt haiyou(and) white nine.
Elias: Jin Hao got new members. Help me take.
Mountbatten: I cannot stand those white nine. You handle them.
ChangKat: Hmm I rather take whole class than new members. You handle them Jin Hao.

Heh What's next. All i see is white and nothing but white now. Ho ho ho Call me White belt expert people. Bow down to Jin Hao!!! CRUAK PUI! Maybe not eh... eh heh heh...

One thing though. More and more things that I either prophesized in terms of how Square Enix intend to publish its games and some things in life. I do not wish more of these things will come true. Please let what i have predicted be fiction.

An Edit People:

People must be wondering why I keep acting stupid all the time. Reason is simple. When i take new members, I have to keep that face of a devil for the whole lesson. I hate that. That is why i always act stupid and I always smile whenever I can. Its just like Joker said, "Why So Serious?"

Driver Error

2008-07-17T05:51:00.000-07:00

Heh. Went to school to do project. After that went home and took bus 67. The bus uncle did a stunt at the road junction in the direction going towards ten mile. He wanted to turn right to Bukit Panjang plaza's direction. Everyone that was on the bus was panic. Many people started talking. Some signalled to the bus uncle turn left. Luckily he did. And the uncles and aunties talked during the whole bus trip. Heh how strangers communicate...

None of my business

2008-07-15T07:58:00.000-07:00

Heh if i am to not know many things discuss. Those are not to be my business. If my curiosity is thought to be a nuisance. I shall not care for anything. I shall care for nothing. I shall shirk all responsibility. So be it. Even though i was worried for a friend. Humans are funny. They put messages to get attention. Yet when you show them attention? They show you the face of a monster.

Time to sleep.

2008-07-14T03:46:00.000-07:00

I am sick and tired of thinking of so many things. Time to sleep and let the other side take over. Just for awhile then.... Sleep...

The project

2008-07-09T07:21:00.001-07:00

Yes the In house project's end is almost here. I can already imagine myself doing part-time jobs to pass my time and earning some cash for new games to be played.

Let's end this project and concentrate on what's to come Jin Hao.

More crap from me

2008-07-05T06:04:00.000-07:00

Yes more crap from me. Today after the Concord Grading, I took my rest and went out to learn swimming from some of my 4-9 brothers. I still did not make much improvement but i will still try until i can do it. Well going down to Jurong swimming complex and learning all day is a sad life.

We cannot do without playing a little bit, so we went to the slide. No float rental? Yes we got restricted to playing with the yellow slide.(which is the lowest) Next, we let it rip! The current of the water in the slide was so strong that each of us rushed down pretty quickly. I got one of the wore landings. With my head crushing down so freaking hard on the surface of the water making me go dizzy. Woo the concussion was bad.

Coming up was the wave pool, which started its engines a little while after we played on the slides. We went in and what we enjoyed the most was sit near the "shore" and let the waves carry us up the "shore" which i find fun and could not stop doing I sure sound like a kid.

Ok enough of those swimming. After packing up and having dinner, we walked pass a few clinics and we saw this......

I got shocked when i saw it. Heard of people speaking "mi" as "moi"? This sure do sounds like "Gaying Mi" HUH?!?! Mdm Gaying Me?!?! I know it's bad to play with people's names. Please forgive me Oh god. Well if there is even one.(Cos i am a Free-Thinker)

While going home. Vincent passed me My Konoka Figurine!!!
Yay!! KO-NO-KA! KO-NO-KA! This is the character in The anime Negima with my dream girl personality. Her dress style is also of my favourite. Yes. People can say. Her moe factor to me is OFF THE CHARTS!!!!! Ok enough for today.

Sense

2008-07-03T10:04:00.000-07:00

There is never a better song to describe the feeling I have these days.

Romanji

uso nante tabun tsukesou ni nai sora utsukushikute
koe wo dasu koto mo tsumi ni narisou de namida afuredashiteku

toki to toki no hazamade
subete wo misukasarete tashikani miete kuru mono ga aru
warui yokan wa shinai
kitto mirai ga boku wo matteru kara, kinou made ni sayonara wo
sukoshizutsu michitekuru kankaku ni mezameteku

kegareta kehai wo yuudachi no senrei kiyomete yuku
soshite arawareta chirinaki sora ni wa ukabu ketsui no hikari

kako ni koukai wa nai
kanashimi wa toki hanachi ima mirai e to susumu kigasuru
kotae wa mune no naka ni
mae wo muite arukidasu sono toki wa, jibun dake no shouri e to
sukoshizutsu chikazuite hajimari wo kanjiteru

(kanjite ah.....)

toki to toki no hazamade
subete wo misukasarete tashika ni miete kuru mono ga aru
togisumasareta hitomi
soko ni utsusareta mirai no jibun ni maketakunai
ima wa mada sukoshizutsu chikazuite
hajimari wo kanjiteiru

(kanjite.... kanjite.....)

___________________________________________________________________

Kanji

嘘なんて多分つけそうに無い空美しくて
声を出す事も罪になりそうで涙溢れ出してく

時と時の狭間で
全てを見透かされて確かに見えてくる物がある
悪い予感はしない
きっと未来が僕を待ってるから、昨日までにさよならを
少しずつ満ちてくる感覚に目覚めてく

汚れた気配を夕立ちの洗礼清めて行く
そして現われた塵無き空には浮かぶ決意の光

ここに後悔はない
悲しみは解き放ち今未来へと進む気がする
答えは胸の中に
前をむいて歩き出すその時は、自分だけの勝利へと
少しずつ近づいて始まりを感じてる

時と時の狭間で
全てを見透かされて確かに見えてくる物がある
研ぎ澄まされた瞳
そこに映された未来の自分に負けたくない
今はまだ　少しずつ　近づいて　始まりを感じている

__________________________________________________________________

English

The sky that tells no lies is beautiful
Speaking too may be a sin yet tears are pouring out

During those moments
When everything is seen true some things will become clear
But I have no bad feelings
Because the future　is waiting, so I bid yesterday farewell
As I awaken to the sensations that fill me slowly

A shower washes clean this trace of dirt
And now the light of determination lingers in the unstained sky

The past holds no regrets
So I set my sorrows free and head towards the future
In my heart is the answer
As I walk towards my own victory
I seem to get closer and closer to the place where it all began

During those moments
When everything is seen true some things will become clear
To these trained eyes
I don't want to lose to my future self reflected there
Even now it is getting closer and closer
The place where it all began

Walking into unchartered grounds

2008-06-30T03:09:00.000-07:00

As many have tried many things in the world. I did the unthinkable which almost landed me into something far worse than i imagined.

As many have known i have tried many things too. Some which are stupid some which i can say helped me a lot.

However, there is this one which almost brought me trouble so much i cannot handle anymore. I tried to make myself someone who is his happiest and i did it. I am a happy person now and i am easily satisfied. I tried different styles of teaching on my students in concord and i did it with many failures and such. In the end? I learnt to avoid the bad things one should do in teaching and keep the good thing which are needed.

The bad one that I have been saying in this post is trying to feel depressed. There was once i told myself. What does people who goes into depression think of. I went and do it and found myself inside a never ending struggle for survival. Although i did not suffered from what depression patients rally had. I almost plunged myself deep into the well of depression. Every thought was negative. Every comment seemed like they will oppose you. Every thing seemed bad. After some talk with Sin Yu and some long thinking, i figured something out which i cannot explain. I also remembered that i had wanted to try this. I have tried it and i wish to avoid this kind of case no matter what.

Its like when i was a kid, I always hated the smell of cigarette. However, when asked to try one puff, i really did tried. The first puff was bad for me and i never touch any cigarette ever again.

I am really glad i got off from this never ending maelstrom. And i will never throw myself back into that place again unless for people who are important to me.

I have lost myself

2008-06-29T05:03:00.000-07:00

Recently I have been acting weirdly. Why? there is this maelstrom from within my brain that is causing all this.

Many things happened recently. I do not know who i am now after all those things happened. In short, i have lost myself...

Some shown me the way i was treated. Some shown me the insignificance of my actions. Even after i tried my hardest to help people out. Some even shown me my helplessness of not being able to help people around me.

Some times i want to ask people what do they think of me. I get no answer.

My thoughts these days also become so negative. It made me think maybe i have some sort of depression. I do not know. What i know is, every comment that come at me will be taken in with negative view.

Where is the old me? I do not know too. I have lost him in the midst of the storm...

I have made a decision. I shall find myself in that storm. However, i intend to do it myself since people cannot answer me questions that i asked. I do not know what kind of person i am. I have to do it only with help of my family and myself.

I am sorry my TKD friends. I don't think i will be going down for any TKD trainings anywhere anytime now. TKD is the place where most of my happy times are but also the place where most of my sadness is at. I simply need sometime to quiet down. I simply need to avoid the place where many things are happening now. Please don't tell me things like the students i am in charge of in concord primary... I hate the feeling of being "coerce" into doing something.

Ever since i came back for tkd on the first year of my polytechnic life, i see many unfair things happening. Like how Hong Sheng not getting to train at all. I see things like people delegating things they should do to others. I am sick of people using their "authorities" asking people to do things. We all train. We all use the targets. We should all take turns to take and not use some stupid position to have people do take those target instead. I take fairness seriously but i do not see fairness in our club. Not enough to be precise...

I've had enough of many things. I need to quiet down. I am only an insignificant person unable to do anything to help people. I only cause destruction indirectly with my stupid decisions making skills. I do nothing to contribute. My presence adds to nothing and my absence affects nothing.

I have never been a normal person. I only get weirder and weirder by the day. Maybe i need to shout out somewhere or get angry for real for once. Holding back everything is taking a lot out of me. My heart feels all squeezed up because of that...

Time... Time...

2008-06-24T05:56:00.000-07:00

Recently I heard and seen many people commenting on how they can travel back in time and change their life. The thing is, if they did change the past, will they be like who they are now? Why not have a super hardworking mindset in the first place for people who did not do well in their exams.

Yes blame it on immaturity. In the end they blame themselves. When we are young we are given many choices and many chances to make mistakes. It is good to make as many mistakes when young but not those that will affect you adversely in the future. We all learn better when we make mistakes. But there are times we should not take for granted. Like not studying before and during exams. Killing someone, backstabbing someone etc.

Everything we do is irreversible. Before doing something bad, especially those which are extreme. think a little bit. How will it turn out in the future. If it does hurt someone else or yourself, will doing it make you feel better. Will there be any guilt or regrets? When doing something good, do you want to give it your all? Or do you want to regret not trying hard enough?

Why look back and blame your old self when you can blame your current self for not concentrating long enough and thinking how to make your future turn out better. Wasting time blaming yourself is never good. Use the time wasted for something else. If you want, look back and laugh at yourself and change for the better. Time waits for no man. If people wish to control time. Have more control over their own life instead.

I do most of what i said in this post so why don't you do it too my readers? Strive for the best in the current state no matter how you don't like it now. Whining is good for helping in de-stresing for everyone but stand up quickly and fight everything that made you fall. We humans can live for centuries or even millenias because we are one of the most adaptive living in the world. We make things that help us survive. And we have family and friends around us to support us.

This world is never about survival of the fittest but about fairness. What you do will lead to what happens in the future. Be careful of what you do. Every action affects the future.

That girl... The one i can't stop thinking of...

2008-06-22T02:49:00.000-07:00

I cannot forget those eyes.
I cannot stop looking at her sharp nose.

She may not be the most beautiful girl I know but deep down, I know i fell for her because I really like who she is. She treats almost everyone around her nicely, so nice, I mistook she has feeling for me. Only to find out it was one-sided

I love it when she is happy but I hate it when she is down. Reason is simple. I feel helpless when she felt that way and could not even lift a finger to help. I know nothing i can do nothing. I could only stand somewhere and watched while she suffered.

I told her I will not leave her alone as she said she may think of sad things that happened in the past whenever she is alone. However, i still could not do it. By not making it a promise, i have comforted myself telling myself "hey its not a promise, so don't worry, you did not break anything." Still, i feel I am running from something.

The thing is. I could think of nothing to entertain her with. I could not get enough attention from her. I was never taken seriously. I wish i can understand her more. Yet there is this part of her in which she hides from many. This led me to find she is so unapproachable at times...

I cannot forget her. I cannot stop thinking about her... I wish to be closer with her.

These days...

2008-06-20T10:13:00.000-07:00

There sure is a lot of BBQs these days for me. One of which was the Sunday Farewell BBQ for Chen Jia. Met most of my 4-9 brothers and some 4-9 girls. I bullied some of the girls and annoyed them with my irritating questions. We did some talking and have some brothers promise they will turn up for Saturday swimming sessions. However, I won't be going for any these days i guess. Since the blisters on my sole have not recovered yet. Amusingly, the condition of blisters did not worsen after the TKD training awhile ago.

Wednesday was the BBQ for the Anglican Taekwondo Club at East Coast.(Yes the club i am in and i am proud to say I am part of it.) I thought of one game to entertain everyone yet i was the one who laughed the loudest. This is how i think up of games. I see the players "suffer" while i "enjoy" seeing them doing those amusing acts. If people want more games, i will gladly think of more *Shows an evil grin

Stayed overnight for the BBQ but did not get any sleep. Since every one was playing Daidi for some time I suggested everyone play poker and losers have to drink coke. However, I did not join in the fun. Why? It is easy i watch the players suffer yet again as I saw them swallow each gulp of coke. The funniest part was when they brought up the stakes making every loser finish one can of coke. I have to say though. Charmaine have very good luck when it comes to poker. She either get Straight or 4 Of a kind. Now that is something so freaking rare.

How mundane eh. Writing about what happened during the last few days but hey, i feel every blog should have this side of it at least once.

Well more for these days. Time for how I feel. Recently, I find that I hate to make choices or give opinions to others. My choices or opinions tend to get comments that are totally opposing them. Yes it is this society that keeps people quiet. Yet when we do not try anything, we learn nothing. This sure reminds me of one of my previous posts. There are times when things were worse... Whatever I said was not taken seriously... People either ignore me or simply commented that i was not serious. However, did they take note on how I talk? I do. I take words seriously and think through why some people used certain words on other people. The friends that hang out with me. Some claimed they know me. Yet they do not know me clearly enough when it comes to seriousness.

Does my face change so much they they cannot interpret? Or am I too much of what they pictured as joker for them to take me seriously. When I want to show people i am serious, i do not laugh or smile when i talk. My friends did not notice this. When i want to make something sound less serious or maybe intended as a joke i will not forget to laugh or smile out or simply add another "lol" as the back of any sentence i type online. I really hope people will take not of this.

I observe the way people act. I find it sick sometimes yet i cannot stop doing it. It seems as though I am a scientist who is studying animals(Not that i am calling any person an animal). This also give me a mindset that my friends are doing the same. And simply picture my friends knowing how i behave and such. One thing... I am wrong in this... We can never study any person too much and be sure that any actions we do will always yield the same results or lead to something we wish to happen. Humans get better and change every little day.

The tone of this post sure sound different from all of my previous post. It sounds more like whining and about me feeling sad. I hope this is the only time i type any post like this. I had always pictured my blog to bring smiles to people when they read it and not how i whine about life.

My precious

2008-06-16T11:11:00.000-07:00

Hoho. My room has had a lot of reunion. Reunion of of my "wives" that is. What am I talking about? Its easy...

My First wife is none other than my Desktop. I had waited very long for her repairs and she is the same as before. Time for me to make her more "beautiful" through upgrading. Oh yes muack muack muack. I am sorry i have neglected you my "wife" I shall show you more attention.

My second wife is my Laptop. Yes i love her. She has spent most of her time with me in school and has accompanied me when my first wife was down.

Next is my new girl friend. We met this year. What am i talking about? It is my PS3. Oh yes. The nice colour and beautiful graphics is can dish out. Simply mesmerizing.

My "Wives" i promise to shower each of you with equal attention and not neglect any of you. No dust shall settle. No rust shall form.

Haha my readers. I know you all will be freaking pissed to know that i wasted my time typing these out. Toooooo BAAAADDDD Bleah!

Resistance...

2008-06-10T07:26:00.000-07:00

These days i find myself spending more and more. In the last two weeks i had overspent my allowance which is a lot compared to many people.

Why? It is easy. With my kind of body which cannnot get any more fat than it is now, i simply cannot resist taking snacks whenever i feel like eating something. The worse is i get hungey almost every 30-45mins. This is bad for someone who treasure money a lot.(Money-minded hoho).

Next, people will ask, why save money then? Easy. In this world, there are things other than food that i have zero resistance against. Those things are comics and games. I do not feel that its is a waste of money to buy comics and tend to buy a lot which makes up my very big comic collections now. Till now have only shown my bleach and naruto collection. However, i have others too.

Next, it comes to games, if i do not save money to buy games, which are so freaking costly, I would have to get cash from my parents which i think is bad enough since I already get my weekly allowance from them.

Money money. It revolves the things I like. Yet I have no resistance against those things.(well... who doesn't?)

Now I shall go back to my money minded ways(No more extra snacks. Breakfasts all settled at home etc.) and make sure i do not over spend. There is also the once in awhile 4-9 gathering. I do not want to go to those meetings only to find myself tight on cash.

Talk about resistance. I think i have zero resistance for girls also. Since i feel unsafe sitting beside any girl. Especially on the bus. Hey its not that I am abnormal but... some things are simply hard to explain eh people... Well it's like when I see a decent looking girl. Take a look too long and I may get labelled as some kind of wolf or lecher. Or when I make a wrong move at the wrong time and touch the wrong place. Blah Blah... I simply feel unsafe...

Existance

2008-05-22T05:29:00.000-07:00

An existance is something hard to explain. To me an existance is something you can feel with your five senses. Why? some of you may ask. If we say an existance is something which has weight and occupies space, you are wrong. An existance is not simply a matter.

We can see light and we call it light that is an existance. Without light, we live in darkness.
We can listen to sounds made by things around us even if we can't feel them with our hands or see. We know sound exists.
We can smell nice food and flowers even though we cannot see or touch the smell
We can taste the sweetness of chocolates and we know something known as sweet exists
We can feel sharpness and even heat. These things exists

Yes we can see any existance around us. Yet, many of those did not appear in the past like the computer, the internet, the TV etc. These things came to light when we humans strive to become better and that we like to learn and discover new things.

However, if our ancestors did not dream of making our lives easier, these things may not be invented. Then we asked ourselves one question. If these things were not discovered or invented, are they thought to be non-existant?

Enough of my funny personal views. From what i said above, i made it sound easy how certain things are discovered but, the effort in bringing in those things to light is far greater than what it seemed. Its like how each mother kept her foetus in a womb for many months to give birth to another interactive existance, A human being.

Many treasured their gift of existance but some threw that gift away and ended their own life. Thinking they will not exist. However, when we think hard, the moment they are born. Part of them had been engraved into the hearts of their loved ones. We cannot say they stop existing after they have left for another place.

There was once i ever thought what life of people around me will be like without me in this world. If i am the proud Jin Hao i will say "WITHOUT ME EVERYONE WILL LIVE IN A BORING WORLD"
Well the humble enough me now will say "Actually the world will not be any different without me. We have so many individuals in this world. Even if i were not born, there will be no difference"

Yes this is what i think. People who hates me will have one less person to put on their hate list and live a little bit happier. For my current friends. I have thought back and found that i only made myself available during outings. Yet i did nothing significant enough to entertain everyone. I was always the one to sit and laugh somewhere. Without me, there would only be one less laughter but, there will be one less me in my family. Nevermind about friends when it somes to family. Without me, i don't think my mother will be as happy as now(I think i am bragging LOL kill me people). Therefore i feel my Existance is important hohoho.

Not that i hate my life or any thing people. Maybe i had too much time left for thinking useless stuff. Thinking about things like this keeps my mind working a little bit. We live in a world which we exist yet we never think of the other side. The world which we do not exist. I like to question about the both sides of many things but when it comes to something bad happening i always look at one side of the story and this led to many bad things happening. This made want to do look at both sides of things more before making any conclusions.

Honey Honey

2008-05-14T07:11:00.000-07:00

MY LADY, boku ni misashite kure yo
Kyou mo kimi wo yume ni
MY HONEY, boku ni nandamo nandamo iiwashitekure I'M LOVIN'
Soshite zenbu uketome kimi no moto he
Niji no hashi wo kakeru

Mata konya mo aeru to ii na

Kimi ga iru to mainichi ga tanoshii
Sara ni sazukaru boku mo ga tanoshimi
Shigoto mo, asobi mo, benkyou mo
Itsumo yori issou ENJOY yo

Anata wa koi shitemasu ne?
Mashite, souka kore ga koi nanoka tte he
Maji de, majime ni kimi no subete ga sukissu
Sokora no IDOL MODEL yori mo ii

Takaku mo hikuku mo nai kimi no se mo
Me mo te mo kami no nioi mo
Soshite nani ijou isshoni itai
Hoka wa nani mo iranai issho ga ii

MY LADY, boku ni misashite kure yo
Kyou mo kimi wo yume ni
MY BABY, watashi ni nandamo nandamo itte hoshii I'M LOVIN'
Soshite zenbu uketome kimi no moto he
Niji no hashi wo kakeru
Mata konya mo aeru to ii na

ii otoko ni wa ii onna ii onna ni wa ii otoko ii otoko ni wa ii onna ii onna ni wa ii otoko

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My Lady, please let me see you
Once again in my dream
My Honey, tell me again and again I'm lovin'
Take it all to where you are,
And we'll build a rainbow bridge

It would be nice to see you again tonight
When you're here, everyday is fun
The more I'm blessed by you, the more I want to be with you
Work, play, and study
I enjoy them more than ever

You are in love, right?
Really, so I guess this is love
Truly, I live all of you
More than any of those idols and models

Every part of you is just right; your size,
Your eyes, hands, and the smell of your hair
And more than anything, I want to be together
I don't need anything else, together it's all fine

My Lady, please let me see you
Once again in my dream
My Baby, tell me again and again I'm lovin'
Take it all to where you are
And we'll build a rainbow bridge

It would be nice to see you again tonight

For good men there are Good women
For good woman there are Good men
For good men there are Good women
For good woman there areGood men

Bonds between us humans.

2008-05-01T09:16:00.000-07:00

In this world, we humans are connected together through bonds. When you met someone and started talking, its like everyone of you are tying a rubber band to each other. As the both of you get to know each other better, the rubber band tightens.

However, when you get hurt, this rubber band sends a negative impulse to those who are really close to you or maybe, all who has this "rubber band" bond with you. They worry for you, they feel hurt.

One of the worst pain comes from us doing something bad to ourselves. Yes hurting yourself means taking pain physically or mentally by yourself, but when you think about it. Its like using a knife or a pair scissors to cut the rubber band, which is very tight between you and the ones close to you. As everyone knows, when a tight rubber band snaps when two hands ull it real hard, the pain on both hands are extreme.

Thats why i told myself, before doing something. Be it bad or be it good. When it hurts others or myself in the process. I have to think thrice before doing. The pain/hurt does not necessary stay with the person who gets everything directly. We have a part of ourslves in many people. They also have a part in us. When they feel pain, the parts of those people who are within us also cry out.

We humans like to hurt other people and ourselves. Yet we do not think of the pain people around us receive. When we finally found out how much they worried or love us, it may be too late to turn some things back to what they were. Just like how cutting a rubberband in the middle is. It snaps and you can never pu it back together. There are still chances to fix it. That is to tie it back up. Next, we will find out, the rubber band may not be as strong as it was before...

Clean-up 2

2008-03-19T23:50:00.000-07:00

Two days ago I started the great cleaning of my room. Yesterday i cleaned the windows(which took a lot of time; 3 hours) and cleaned some of the ceiling. Take good care of your windows my readers. It's a pain to clean them if they get too dusty...

Ok here are some pictures of things i found...

This bottle i found had a few resolutions i made when i was young. I did realised some of those which i wrote.

I found a photo album and look what i found inside...

Photo of my mother when she was very young( 18-19 years old)
ITS MEEE!!(The word on my clothing is "Lion")
My younger sister and me
My elder sister and elder brother

Next, From the eldest to the youngest:

My elder sister in her teengae days(argh i don't have my sister's baby picture)
My elder brother in his teenage days(heh what kind of face is that. Kiss my ass bro lol)
My elder brother when he was a baby!!
Next is Me again (This pose only let me think of "COME ON BABY!")
My younger sister when she was a todler... What a model eh.

Funny after more cleaning up i found a photo inside a booklet which i got after climbing the Great Wall of China

Lastly, here are the bears i found. I received them as a birth gift from my cousin when i was around 10-11 years old. The black robot is something i got when i went our with my elder bro to a carnival.

Ok enough of old things. Here comes the new things i have placed nicely in my room.

THE LONG AWAITED PS3 BABY!!! It's so shiny you can see me taking its picture.
The wireless controller of PS3 lying on top of my Razer Mantis(Control) mousepad.

The overview of my cleaned up room

More of my room.
My bed and that is my nephew with my favourite plushie.(We use that to play imaginary friends with my nephew)
My computers
The router standing on my Altec Lansing sound system.
My TV (Opps i knocked the bears down...)
Lastly, My Fan and air-con.

Conclusion: On this third day of cleaning i have finished 90& of cleaning and i am vey proud of it cos the dust is gone in many places. The remain 10% is to clean up the walls and ceiling. In the last pic some of you maynoticed some black patches. Those shall be settled tomorrow. Final day of cleaning. With a new and clean room comes a new life. Everyone is changing so am i. Accept the good changes and try and prevent the bad ones from happening. Make the good happen. That's all people.

The clean-up 1

2008-03-18T05:46:00.000-07:00

Everyone has a room they sleep in. If lucky enough, you share a room with someone that helps clean up the room if it is in a mess. Unlucky, and you get someone who will add on to the mess. While for me, i simply leave the room as it is. I did not clean up and did not add on much mess to it. However, as the days went by, the amount of mess accumulates and my room turns into something which i felt not good for me.

So my readers, which one of the above are you? Do you clean up your room. Make a mess of your room. Or like me, simply let the mess accumulate day by day?

Well today, i started cleaning up my room and i started from the closet which i keep my comics and some miscellaneous things.

Take a look at the mess before...

An Overview of the mess

The place where i kept all my comics(manga)

All the miscellaneous stuff

There also some things I found within the rubbish...

Here is a Pooh bear Tissue Box skin. Too bad it is quite dirty so i have to throw it into the washing machine.(AWW Poor Pooh!!! you have to roll in the drum of the machine)

Another thing i found is my secondary school report book and look what's inside.

A photo of my younger self.(I look funny don't I)

Hey hey hey my graduation book

One of the first few presents i received from my classmates on my birthday

My infamous O'level results slip(CCB! CCB! CB! Very vulgar eh!)

Hoho. Such a nice testimonial

Ok enough with the old things. Here is the state of my closet currently i have to say i am quite satisfied.

I split up my comics and placed them nicely

MY NARUTO COMICS/MANGA COLLECTION!

MY BLEACH COMIC/MANGA COLLECTION!

And this is how i placed my secondary school memento

Conclusion: Till now i only shown how i placed my comics but i did not show the overview of the cleaned up room. There is nothing to worry people i shall display everything in my final clean-up post.

Long days

2008-03-04T01:31:00.000-08:00

Again i waited for a long time to do a post and its time to do some cleaning up. Well well... Lets start off with my birthday celebration, which was long ago, then.

There were many celebrations i had for this year. One was on 21 FEB, a Thursday, in which 2 of my brothers Daryl and Min Jie came over with a Cake on the last day of Chinese New Year. I really appreciated their presence on that day as i never had much of a chance to celebrate my birthdays with my friends. The answer is simple. I never had any real friends to celebrate with in the old days.

Come to think of it, my best friend Ray and i never did celebrated each other's birthday together except for last year when i went to his place and i simply hanged out with him and Alwyn for his birthday.

My family did nothing on the actual day for my birthday as everyone was busy so the celebration was postponed to the next day which is 25 FEB. I could not sleep for those few days. Why? Eh.. Simple. I got news of potentially owning a Powerful black coloured Gaming machine that i can only dreamed of.

Lucky enough for me, i got it. HUHUHUAHAHAHAHA. *Evil Grin

Nice for me, these days i am starting to get everything back some in better versions and some simply back to normal.

I can still remember those weeks i had my desktop down. When i changed to my PS2, IT broked too... Next i had to use a laptop with dead pixels and all which is also to be sent for repairs. Therefore, I was feeling down for quite some time.

Must be some curse eh? Daryl even said maybe my house is having a Tech Plague. For some reason my life is lucky enough. That is the reason why i never gamble much. Those luck have all been used up on saving me from the tech plague and getting of good stuff(LIKE THE BLACK MACHINE).

Maybe i will put up A PICTURE OF THE BLACK MACHINE(hohoho!)

Heh almost time for me to touch that BLACK MACHINE. (I can't resist the temptation)

Lastly, i think my family is spoiling me...

Believe...

2008-01-24T10:19:00.000-08:00

When it comes to beliefs, everyone has his own. Those beliefs, can lead to many good things or bad depending on each individual. One examples is that in times of crisis, some believed that they can overcome that turmoil and they did it.

While some simply vanished within the shadows when they failed to believe.

Here, i shall show something which proves sometimes and i mean sometimes(Believing you can fly does not mean you can really fly. No craps please) believing that you can win in certain things can really help.

Below is a video That can further explains a little bit of what i had said. Do take note of the player at the right and take note of what he says in that video
(Wah Heng Ah Heng Ah. There is still chance ma)

As stated above, believing that you can do certain things increases the chance that you can can accomplish those tasks but, there are many things that cannot be done through mere believe and some causes the death of others. Another example i shall quote is about civil wars that happened in ancient times and now. Those are wars that started when people's beliefs conflict with each other which led to many casualties.

Believe is something powerful that we possess. Immersing yourself in your own beliefs too much and you may lose yourself just like those that started those civil wars. Some times stopping and thinking for awhile is not bad.

Night at school

2008-01-20T05:44:00.000-08:00

I am sure its not the first time anyone stay in school until so late at night... Well, I am right now. I had been doing project from 1pm until now and its was just awhile ago that i was done with my part.

This kind of night time atmosphere sure do reminds me of those scenes from AVP. Dark... Scary...

Walking in the wrong direction may mean you get lost in school.

With the build-up of assignments and projects these days, i am sure i have to stay in this place until night time for many more tims other than today.

Damned. My sister's in hospital and i don;t even get the chance to go in and check out her condition(What kind of brother am i?)

Well as anyone would have said, school work comes first. However, i doubt i will have any time to go out much.(There goes my freedom)

Looks like its almost time for me to leave so i shall stop from here on.
Hey come to think of it, i haven't had my meal yet. *collapsed

egao wo anata ni agetai

Live To Try, Live To Learn

2008-01-07T08:32:00.000-08:00

It has been long from when i last touched this blog. Some people must be wondering whether i will ever touch it again.

Well... Here i am.

What was i doing during those days away from blog?

Easy... i was simply trying many things out in game and reading up on things on the internet nothing much. Talk about trying things, i remember last time i ever smelt my feet to know the intensity of the stink everyone told me about since it is hard to describe how smelly can be. Unable to handle the smell and can't bear to live with athlete's foot, i went to surf the internet in search of solutions while watching those health shows on my TV which is beside my computer.

In a few months, the feet problems was solved and no more smelly feet(I can't believe i actually smelt my feet in the first place but hey, i really did that)

Trying things out really is fun. I learn many thing in the process(like how stinky an athlete's foot can be) and trying out many different punishment tactics on those young children i was assigned to teach Taekwondo to... It is also "Fun" in a way ^.^

However, when i did try something and it failed, sometimes i failed in embarrassing circumstances which lead me to avoid trying those "plans" i had made ever again. It was lesson learnt for me. When i thought hard, failing now isn't bad anyway since i do learn a lot. Its far better than making mistakes when i get old. I learn certain things slower and my ego may get ahead of me.

Thinking back, there are also many things which i tried that are sort of funny and disgusting ones(kids don't try this at home) like smelling how stinky my shit is. throwing plastic ball or plushies at my mum and getting chased around the house by her with "weapon" in hand. Blocking my mother's view while she is watching TV by shaking my butt in front of her face. Woo How fun is that. The usual beating i get is those from a cane or being kicked at the butt.

I always try out things to learn what will happen of course not the undesirable acts or crimes. Most things that can't be describe can be answered with simply by trying. Still many should be left to the professionals to do just as the host of the TV show brainiac will say "We do these things so you don't have to".

Trying things is so fun baby.

Death from the heavens? Maybe not...

2007-12-10T03:09:00.000-08:00

Ho ho Today i went to school and did my DWA(developing web applications) common test and i can say the best i mark that will ever appear is a B or maybe a B+.

The paper ended on 12.30pm and yes it was lunch time so i went with my clique to Bukit Timah Market. Man i have to say those market type hawker centres sure have high ceiling. One other example is the Lao Ba Sha.

Ok i ordered one fried prawn mee 3 dollars for my lunch and canj say i am pretty much satisfied of the quantity but if anyone ask me, i say Ngee Ann Poly sells much better fried prawn mee(Visit Canteen 3 to find out more).

And there i was savoring my plate of prawn mee when something hit my forehead and slided down to my right eyelid. Then i noticed something black on my glasses and took them off take a look. On first look, it looked like bird droppings(Oh SHIT!) then i rushed down to the first floor toilet leaving my classes on the table(Oh why did i not bring them along?) paid ten cents to the auntie there and did some washing up. Then i remember my i forgot my glasses so i took a trip back for them and washed them up.

After the cleaning, i went back to my table and check out what hit me. Thanks to my luck, the thing that hit me fell in and angle so nicely that it hits the table, my face and not the prawn mee(woohoo!!). After observing properly, my friends and i found out that it was not bird droppings but some dirt which i had fallen off from the ceiling and hit me.

Well.. after the observation, i finished off the mee and the whole company went home. The end. I have to say though, the rain caused this. Wet environment, dirts will turn gooey and fall off. Then again, the wind from the rain saved me... causing the dirt to miss the food...

My Pops 2

2007-11-27T01:20:00.000-08:00

The day i typed my last post, my poppy was doing fine and all but the two days before I make this post(25 November 2007) he was very ill...

Thew symptoms are similar to those which i had when i was down with Double Diarrhoea.(read the Double Diarrhoea post if you want to)

That was the first time i ever see the man who had always been strong in my eyes becoming that weak. We talked a little with each other a little. I helped him bought his dinner and did what we would always do, simply talk and watch the TV together.

What was bad that he had to pass his dinner out as soon as he ha finished it.(Maybe i am exaggerating but anyone will know if he/she gets that kind of diarrhoea)
I really do hope that he will get well really soon... he even cancelled his Monday(26 November 2007) birthday celebration and postponed it to today...

Oh well... As they say, "It only takes one day to get ill but many days to get well."
I sure hope everyone takes good care of themselves.

My Pops

2007-10-28T06:58:00.000-07:00

Went to find my pops and yes we talked about many things like we always did. First, it was cellphones. Due to my elder brother telling poppy that my old one had spoiled. Poppy intend to buy me a new one(HOLY SHIT!!! NEW PHONE??) and i all i want now was a simple phone. One will know, a new phone could mean that my younger sister will also ask for one from father and if she cannot get it, she will just curse everyone with vulgarities.

Ok enough of that. Next we talked about street magics. One of those street magics that amazed my father was the trick of levitation by Criss Angel the Mindfreak. I wonder how he does that.

Not long after, my father talked about those times he would always visit pasar malam in his neighborhood when he was younger.(in the olden days, there would always be pasar malam every Monday) And in that place, some street magic performers would do their tricks in front of many with my father observing how they did those things. One example of those tricks was using a paper straw to pierce through a cucumber.

The talk of magic tricks led to the subject of my father's duck rice selling days when he would juggle balls of rice with bowls with skill and precision. "Business was so good i those days and of course our duck rice was delicious. The juggling was a form of extra service." He had said.

Lastly, he told me that of his life when he was very young. Those days, he would wander in Malaysia with Grandfather in search of jobs.One of those jobs Grandfather had was to guard a pineapple field located high up in a hill. In the past, there were tigers in the hills. Guarding the field from humans was not a problems. Living in those conditions meant that one could not sleep peacefully. Once the roar of a tiger is near. One would shiver in fear of danger that may come. They lived in a shack only strong enough to block off rain and mosquitoes but not tigers. Grandfather quited the job after a short time.

Life for poppy sure was hard. It had made him to strive for a better life which he has now. It set me to think. What will i become in the future to come. Will i become like him, or will i become someone useless.

Fun on the dining table

2007-10-09T05:09:00.000-07:00

At home most of us have a dining table. With that, most of us had many meals together with their family member especially dinner times.

Different families also mean different eating habits so let me talk about those things my family have. Starting from the one with the highest position.

Uncle(or my step-father I do not call him father simply because my biological father is still alive and i still have contact with my bio-father.)

Ok i would call uncle a clean-up eater. These days he usually come home late after most of the family members had finished their meal. When he reaches home he will first change up and slowly walk to the dining table. Next, within a few minutes, he would finish up all the food on all of the dishes. I would get so fed up over it. Why? It is because my mother usually cook up great amount for each dish and i always like to savour the leftovers during my own sweet time.
However, those hopes were dashed when the clean-up eater comes home.

Mother

My mother usually eats the least. Nothing much to talk about but why does she not like cheese when i love it.

Elder Sis

She's the one in the house that eats almost anything. She had a big appetite but after she had given birth her son, she decided not to eat so much now. There is also her signature burp at the end of dinner which sounds like frogs going "Ribit"

Elder Bro

Next on the list. The first one in the house to be called the rice container. He likes using the plate to eat where most of us in the family use bowl. From my observation, the plate allows him to bring with him loads of rice to the table and also to fill the plate up with loads of food.

Next is none other than me.

To simply call me a rice container is an insult for my stomach is the size of the universe. When there are many people eating on the same table. I usually eat slowly and in very little amount as many had said, eating slowly is good for health, it also helps a lot for those in a diet. Those that eat slowly tend to get full faster than usual. Once in a blue moon, when there are tonnes of food on the table, i will swallow my food very quickly and take down as many dishes as i can. This shows eating quickly makes one's appetite increase dramatically however, it is bad for the health. Therefore, eating slow is still the best when it comes to eating. Take your time tasting your food and have a healthy and happy stomach.

Younger Sis

The can be called the queen of vegetables in the family. When it comes to too much vegetables, we can count on her to finish seventy percent of those vegetables. Well that can explain her slim figure that many may want.

Younger Bro

When eating most food, no chilli will mean no eating for him. He also have that enormous stomach size and could not stop eating and he inherited the clean-up genes from his father.

Well, enough of eating habits, lets talk about what happened on during dinner time.
I shall first start off with chicken wings. Divide a chicken wing into three parts you get the drumstick with only one bone, the middle section which consists of two bones. Lastly, the pointy part which has many small sized bones.

My mother cooked stewed chicken wings with only the two-boned middle section which can be bought in big packets as frozen chicken. Tonight we had a competition. The contestants are my elder sis, my younger bro and me. We wanted to compete on who can put the chicken wing in his mouth then take out only the bone and only the bone. Skin and meat are to stay in the mouth. It can be easily done since the chicken wings are stewed so much that the skin are soft enough to be tear up easily.

To my younger bro and my amazement, our elder sis did that stunt within three seconds. My bro and had to take about 7-10 seconds to do it. It was like watching cartoons looking at how the cats finish up fish in one gulp finishing up all the meat and skin taking out the bone from their little mouth.

My bro and i could not stop laughing when we saw how our sis did it.

Well that's the fun i have during dinner times with my family once in awhile. Be filling up next time to talk about anymore special things during meal times.

Mid-Autumn Festival

2007-09-25T09:45:00.000-07:00

Went to Chinese Garden to celebrate Mid-Autumn festival with my family. However, half of the trip was boring with nothing to do other than looking at lanterns. The fireworks shown sure was nice and there was this short detour of taking a small walk in the turtle & tortoise museum on the way home.

And boy was i surprised. I got the chance to see one humungous Tortoise. There were many more species and those with rocky shells sure caught my attention. They look "stylro" as i would say. Some sure freaked me out. Those which were called snake heads. Now we know why turtles or tortoises are reptiles and not amphibians that is ONE of those reasons.

Well enough of reptiles. Recently i felt that Mid-Autumn festival is getting more and more boring. From a young boy who always looked forward to it to someone who feels as though he want to sleep the whole day.

Thinking back Mid Autumn nights were trips to relatives' homes and playing at the void deck candles, lanterns, catching, having BBQs etc.

Fun places, Fun things, Fun games, Fun Times...

The Airport

2007-09-13T22:48:00.000-07:00

The day before, i went to Changi Airport with my mother, my younger brother and my nephew. What for? That is to send my brother off as he was going to go to Korea with his Wife(My sister-in-law) for a sort of second honey moon leaving their son under sister-in-law's mother's care.

My group(which consist of my mother, younger, nephew and me) reached the Airport much earlier than the meeting time, went to Terminal 1 via the skytrain and took a walk around. During that short walk, i noticed a water cooler.

To many, a water cooler is nothing much. However, to me, it gives me a nostalgic feeling. Thew story goes like this. My family and many other relatives and i do mean MANY. Went to terminal 1 to send off a cousin who was suppose to study overseas. While waiting, My cousins(especially my "Best Cousins") decided to play around. We played long jump using the square tiles as markers and i loved to cheat playing that game. Whenever we were highly exhausted and thirsty, we would go to that water cooler and took out turns to quench that thirst of ours. Then we would switch to the usual game of short sprint which wads played by my best cousins and me only. I would always be the one to lag behind due to my short legs but, after the race, they would always look at me and wait for me to finish. I did not know why, but i felt good whenever they did that. What do we do after each race, we went to the same water cooler again.

Thinking back sure felt good.

The airport is also the place for many more memories like the China trip in which i went with my classmates and sending off certain classmates on their trips and all. Well writing on will make this post too long. Therefore i shall lift off from here.

What inspired me to blog

2007-09-06T01:01:00.000-07:00

There are two persons in my life that inspired me to blog. My Classmate KL. From his blog, i see a well of feelings. The way he types is in a way i never see before in blogs of many others.

Many used singlish in their blogs which turned me off for reason i do not know. However when i first stumbled upon KL's blog i will not mimic his style of writing but i his in his blog he inserted many words which i do not understand or did not know how to use.

With his normal classroom behavior, one can only imgaing him to be the best cockster of cocksters. However, you see a totally different person in his blog. He does not fool around in his blog, he expressed his feelings with the correct use of words in my point of view.

Some times i thought in my mind that will i be able to use those words he used with my own style or will i be many others that asked for help in languages only to mimic his style without knowing...

Well for the other one that inspired me, reason is almost the same plus i am lazy to type so, i will lift off from here...

Thank You

2007-09-01T02:18:00.000-07:00

There are three videos in this post and the first one is dedicated to those who were around me during those funny times. Read the lyrics and they will describe how i feel. The other 2two videos are simply songs from the same band which are nice. Enjoy... (If you are unable to view the videos, please use a Firefox web browser.)

Online Videos by Veoh.com

Online Videos by Veoh.com

Online Videos by Veoh.com

Quotes from games

2007-08-27T23:32:00.000-07:00

Final Fantasy

This is my story. It'll go the way I want, or I'll end it here.(Final Fantasy X- Tidus)
____________________________________________________

Onimusha

One has fallen without realising his final hope. One has fallen, clinging to his faith. One has fallen leaving the fate of the future to his companions. History is riddled with the waves of destruction and rebirth these waves rolled forward, far into the future. Much has been destroyed. Many has perished.(Shin Onimusha: Dawn of Dreams__Narator)
____________________________________________________

Kingdom Hearts

A scattered memory like a far-off dream. A far-off dream like a scattered memory. I want to line the pieces up, yours and mine.(Kingdom Hearts II game opening)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There are many worlds, but they share the same sky- one sky, one destiny.
____________________________________________________

All these quotes inspire me in a way. They set me to think deeply. What kind of story will unfold during and at the end of the game. This is one of it that makes a game. Without story, a game is almost without life. Just as us. Our lives are our stories. Our story will only end when we die. You are the protagonist. Your friends are the characters that appears in they story that helps you out. Fates intertwined, memories connected. You may remember part of an incident that happened in your life. Your friends may remember other parts. When all are chained together. We will see a stories unfold in different thoughts, views...

Heh this shows game can make one think depending on the player. Some play for the sake while some play to enjoy every little element of the game like me ahaha.

Double Diarrhoea

2007-08-17T07:56:00.000-07:00

Everything was smooth on the day 17th August 2007 until...... I puked inside a train going towards Queenstown station, my dinner. (Warning. Disgusting Parts Ahead. Viewer Discretion is Advised) When the train moved. It felt as thought something was pushing the food substances out of my body. Slowly, slowly, the food substances moved up my mouth to the extend i could not hold back anymore.

Then came the "release". The "food" flowed out like water under high pressure from a water hose I thought one wave of it was enough but i was wrong. There were two more waves that followed after. The "food" flowed onto my bag which accompanied me for 5 yearsthen down my right leg. Everything was sticky and surely, stinks.

We dropped off at Queenstown station to do some cleaning up for me and my belongings. After that, I decided to go home while Damien and Ernest passed me a nice black plastic bag for emergency. I rejected at first but accepted in the end to act as precaution.

There was a feeling of Deja Vu during my trip back to Yew Tee. When the train was going fast on its way to Yew Tee. I could not hold back the overwhelming force pushing the "food" out was unstoppable. LUCKY there was the HOLY plastic bag that Damien and Ernest gave me. Everything was let off inside. After the verbal diarrhoea, there was excruciating pain around my abdomen area and i rushed home. (IF ONLY THERE WAS NOT ANY SLOW WALKING PEOPLE BLOCKING MY WAY THE JOURNEY WOULD HAVE BEEN MORE SMOOTH) A-hem i am sorry for the CAPs before.

When i got home i rushed to the toilet for yet another round of throwing up. I thought the pain in the abdomen was due to the fact i needed to puke but i was wrong. I had to sit on the toilet bowl and let it rip. (WARNING another disgusting part coming up. Viewer Discretion is Adviced again.) At first, the stools i observed had shape and form. However, as time goes by while the shit-then-puke process went on, the stools i let out gradually turned more and more liquified . The intense battle ended after about thirty-eight minutes and after that, i took a shower and slept in my nice bed. Think about it. With all the exhaustion, even taking a shower was a chore, i had never fel that weak before, even when i had fevers.

And sorry for this disgustion post for I felt i had to vent out some frustions i had. It was the first time i ever felt that showering was a chore and all. Signing off. I sure hope i will not hve to write such post again......

First Impressions

2007-08-09T09:40:00.000-07:00

Hoho. On the day 9th August 2007 i was not in Singapore celebrating its nation day, instead i went out with the Taekwondo company for a one day trip to Malaysia. Yes, most of you people reading this post are not seeing things. It was a simple one day trip.

Like always i shall skip the bad parts as they will dampen everyone's spirits. Everything started off with 6 guys, Hong Sheng, Sin Yu, Yan Shun, Damien, Ernest and me meeting up at Lot 1 Taxi stand. We all arrived at 7.30am and waited for transports to arrive. When the transports, all the whole company which consist of twenty-five people was split into two groups of 12 youngsters (with us six guys included) and another group of thirteen grown-ups. Then the two groups were assigned to two different vans each.

After some time, we went pass Singapore's side of the customs and board. However, somethingwas different. Mr Lee decided to travel on the Youngster's van(which is our transport). Awhile later, we moved off. During the journey to the Malaysia customs, Mr Lee did some short introductions. While that was happening, one of Mr Lee's niece made a bad comment which pissed us off.

When we reached Malaysia, we stopped awhile at a street for a short breakfast. Next, we set off for Cukop(a city in Malaysia).

A few hours passed and we reached a sea side restaurant. The usual plan was to have lunch there then have a boat ride in the seas but the whole company of twenty-five took the boat ride first as there was a strong sea smell at the restaurant.

During the boat ride i got to understand a bit about building kelongs(floating platforms at the surface of the sea for fishing and in some cases, as a home for the fishermen) in the sea from the explanation of the boat captain. One condition is that, there needs to be land to act as natural barrier for protection from high tide. Although there is high and low tides where the kelongs are built but without its natural barrier, there will be waves that will rise high enough to engulf those kelongs.

Then i wonder... The first man to ever build a kelong must have gone through a lt of hardships building homes in the seas only to have them collapse one by one until he finally found a suitable location to build on which may become his fishing hub or a home.

When the explanation was over, we were brought to a kelong. Yes, it was the real thing. However, it is not a big one with a home. It is simply a fishing hub. There we got to see many different types of fishes, mostly edible. Even jellyfish. Yes it is jellyfish and none of you that are reading this post are seeing things. The boat captain told us that they actually put those jellyfish out in the sun to dry them up, do some treatment and they will become food.

However, of everything that the captain had shown me, what fascinates me the most was the Archerfish. The boat captain put a small partially dried small fish(ikan bilis) on a wooden plank above the fishes leaving only the head of the dried fish visible. The Archerfishes all started to slow down their movement stick their snout out as if taking aim looking highly concentrated. The concentration the fishes shown when preparing to hunt down their "prey" was like that of any wild life lizards like a chameleon, slowly, slowly... SQUISH! The tongue of the chameleon got its prey. In the Archerfish's case, it shot a jet of water at the dried fish, it's "prey", the "prey" flipped into the air and dropped into the water and as the "prey" was nearing the water, the fish rushed towards where the "prey" would land and GULP! There goes the "prey"...

Great accuracy in hunting. The dried fish was dead and was not moving but the captain told us the usual diet of Archerfish are the agile insects that usual fly above the surface of the water. What which may take us a few minutes to get rid of can all be handled with one fish.

For the boat ride. I do not know what happened but during the whole ride we get to know Mr Lee's nephew and nieces better and get to joke around a bit. To me, it was simply Sin Yu and Hong Sheng's magic. When each of them is alone, they are quiet but when both of thewm get together, the atmosphere around everyone changes into a fun one.

For the rest of the day we six guys got along well with Mr. Lee's nephew and nieces which shown me that first impressions are never accurate. They only show people one side of the coin. Whether to see the other side is up to oneself just as truth is in the eye of the beholder.

Well the day passed by very quickly, when the boat ride was done we had out lunch back at the restaurant, moved off for durians and some other fruits, took a walk which was almost three-fifth the size of Jurong Point. and lastly, diinner at a restaurant and we returned home. A simple outing for a imple day. Nothing much... Heh Heh.

Taekowondo

2007-08-04T07:30:00.000-07:00

Ho ho ho. For me, i learnt Taekwondo when i was thirteen years old.(Yes Secondary One) One main reason i love this sport is that it got me and Ray(My best friend) together. We rised together. Did our kicks together. In short, we did a lot of fun things during our Taekowndo days.

However, due to my blunder in the past, hegot to black belt while i had to stay as a black-tip. The reasons were easy and pure blunders. I forgot about gradings and i failed my black belt grading.

There was once i stopped going for Taekwondo. One main reason was the secondary four four students' stepping down from their CCAs which happens in every Secondary school. Another reason was that my laziness got the better of me. The next one was the failure in black belt grading i had which dropped my morale totally coupled with my slow learning rate.

I stopped practicing Taekwondo at the start of secondary four for more than a year and wasted my time playing and doing nothing during my free time.

Everything changed when i started my polytechnic life. When one of my classmates asked for me to join the polytechnic Taekwondo with him.

When i went for those trainings in poly, something kept calling out to me but i did not know what it was. However, it was not long until i found out... I enjoyed Taekwondo... Every bit of it...
I found that out when i was doing the basics, the patterns, the kicks, the sparring. Every bit of it. I had almost forgot how fun Taekwondo was to me. It was almost everything to me. I get to know my best friend Ray and many others that love Taekwondo as much as me. Those fun times.

When i returned to Regent's Taekwondo one day out of the blue. Everyone was shocked. "The guy who was thought to have quited Taekwondo went back for training." I devoted more of my time to Taekwondo even to the extent of stop watching Pokemon on Satyurdays(It's my favourite show. Do not insult it. Just watch it as though it is a documentry and some of you will get what i mean.) to help out at Concord Primary School shouting my throat coarse.

There was once I asked myself, "Why did i even think of stopping Taekwondo for one second the last time?" Having missed many things, i intend to catch up.

I will not make empty promises like "I WILL NEVER QUIT TAEKWONDO!!!" but i can make one such as "I will never give up."

To keep training/teaching. To keep moving...

My Mother

2007-07-22T09:57:00.000-07:00

I came back from Primers Dinner and Dance not too long ago at 12.40pm exactly. To reach home late again. This means i had to call my mother to tell her about coming home late.

The moment i reached the doorstep of my home, i saw my mother infront of the living computer playing her favourite game. Come to think of it, mum would usually be in her room and i would report straight to her room, telling her that i am home. I forgot when i started reporting to her when i got home. I only remember that it start quite long ago.

Why? Some may ask. The reason is, deep inside, i am worried about my mother. Checking her up in her room and making sure she is there takes a load off my heart every night. If she is not home, i will call her to check out her whereabouts just the same as her calling me to know where i am.

I cannot imagine not being able to find out where she is or to see her get into dangers of any kind.

She is one funny mother one will say. The way she plays with all of us(my siblings and me) when we were young. We would laugh non-stop. She also showers us with equal amount of attention. However, due to the fact we all love her a lot, we would try and cmtepe for more attention from her. My life can be seen to be same as that of Kurosaki Ichigo from the popular anime bleach. My mother is the core or maybe, the heart of the family. Losing my mother will deal a great blow to my other family members and me.

Although sometimes i may talk in a bad tone to my mother, i did feel really bad after that, but i do not know why saying apologising to parents is the hardest compared with saying "sorry" to a friend. With that, i will usually do some things to try and make mother smile again. To see her smile because of those actions made me feel elated.

I love my mother the most out of everyone because she is the only one who accepts who i am not what i am. I do hope people out there will love their mother like i do but every family works differently and i am not one who can comment on other people's family. I have one friend who put a funny personal message in his msn messenger, "Your birthday is the day your mother cries like hell to get you out" I laughed at this message but it lead me to make a promise to myself. I will try my best to celebrate birthday with my mother every year since she cried and screamed hard just to push me out of her womb.

Well i will stop here now.

The unexpected

2007-07-15T02:16:00.000-07:00

Two days before this post, on Friday 13 July 2007. I went for the usually night time training Changkat CC. When the company(Sin Yu, Hong Sheng, Yan Shun, Ernest, Damien and yes... ME!) reached the CC, we saw Mr Lee's son. It was something that had not happened for a long time. Mr Lee turning up earlier than start of training time by a lot? Usually Mr Lee would turn up around 7.50+ to 8.00pm. We were thinking what was so special that day.

Not long after we seated, we saw a grand sight. Something which i had not seen for 4 years. Mr Lee in full Taekwondo Uniform(full Tobok or full Gi to some people). For an instance, time had slowed down as Mr Lee walked by us.

However, at the same time, we were filled with thoughts of hell or anything which seemed similar to hell. Why? some may ask... Well, to see Mr Lee in full uniform, means to see ourselves in more intense training. Indeed, is has been long since the company had intense training conducted by Mr Lee himself but for Ernest, it can be said as his first time.

A while later, we lined up in three rows to get ready for foot work. Cherie joined in the training. Jason came too but did not join in.

The foot work we did was of different nature compared with what Mr Tan had us do. It was, in a sense, more complicated and taxing for the knee one would say. After the foot work, we had technique training while Hong Sheng had to back out due to his bad sole injury which he had gotten during the foot work session. Before we went off, Mr Lee emphasized that his style of foot work is bad for the knees and that we should take good care of them if not we may not be able to do intense exercise with them anymore in thirty years time just as many sports atheletes.

Well end of story for that Friday. The next day, a Saturday, that means going to Concord Primary School to help out. Hong Sheng was missing... Reason being his mother did not allow him to go out with the bad sole injury he had sustained the day before.

The students behaved much more rowdy that day. My hypothesis was that it was due to Hong Sheng's absence and from that, i concluded that the students in Concord do not give a damn who the others, including me, are. They were more quiet with Hong Sheng around. Only the white nines, who were promoted to yellow belts not long ago listened to me more than the others. Other than the four most talkative ones whom i called the Four Heavely Kings who lived in their own world when talking and they would not stop unless those around them tell them to stop.

The next time i go to Concord, I will simply take care of the alignment and the yellow belts. That will be all for the usual Saturday teaching i guess.

The Black Horse

2007-07-11T10:26:00.000-07:00

On this day, my trip to Regent for Taekwondo is a somewhat special one. Lets start from the more trivial events first then. Many members turned up for training.(Oh Yeah Baby!)

"What's next?" Some may ask . Well two new members join into the Regent Taekwondo family. Well well...... Enough about trivial things. Lets get to business. When i reached Regent for training, there was a little commotion. Ernest asked for a sparring session with Damien.

The sparring started off normally with both sides exchanging kicks once they find openings. There were also blocking, dodging and countering of kicks. However, the sparring turned one sided when Mr Lee made his first advice to Damien. What i heard was, "45 degrees and a turning kick!" And what happened next was unbelievable. Damien delivered what Mr Lee had stated swiftly and scored a point with a "BOOM!". Anyone who knew what went on was stunned for a few seconds. Caught off guard by how swift Damien executed that technique. Using the word "fast" would be an understatement but it is hard to describe with words. One has to be there to feel it.

Thinking back, Damien who did not know much about sparring would jump around sometimes and do certain funny kicks that would never score a point. Yes Damien is the Black Horse i am talking about. One who improved unexpectedly...

After some time the sparring ended and the party asked for me to spar with Damien next. The session with me had nothing special. I managed to score some points and Damien also had his share of points from me. When the session ended, i had mixed feelings. One was, "I did good for today i guess." The other feeling was, "This is Damien's second round of sparring. He did not spar with me at full power......" I sort of felt inferior for a moment but soon after that, i told myself to forget about that and move on.

Soon after the sparring, i was asked to teach the two new comers THE BASICS. Now now, some people who are reading this know how bad i am with it.(Oh well...) I tried to teach those two new comers with what i know and the training in Regent ended not long after that.

The sparring sessions today enlightened me in a way. Anyone who is new at doing something can emerge the best as long as there is the correct attitude and correct guidance by the people who are better. It does not matter whether you have talent or not. It only matters if you give up doing something simply because you are not doing good with it...

Heavy headed

2007-07-10T06:27:00.000-07:00

Today start out as any normal Tuesday when i would oversleep and turn up late for my Database lecture. However, today is different. I stayed up the whole night the night before until 5.30am plus in which i dozed off. That led to me waking up on 8.15 am which is bad as my class starts at 9.00am. Combining my morning routine with the travel time would mean that it takes one hour for me to reach school.

I was unable to concentrate for the whole day in school. Either i was easily distract by something or i would simply sit down in a quiet place and put half of myself to sleep and the other half to listening. It was as good as listening things with one ear and having those thing come out from the other ear of mine.

The only time i concentrate my mind was when i did the Database assignment with my team.

Next came my EBF(E-Business Foundations) lecture. Due to my lack of sleep, my head felt really heavy and i was on the verge of dozing off into dream land. Then, something came to mind. It was to play games on my laptop. For some reasons, i am always alert when playing games and that kept me awake for the whole of EBF lecture. One trick i used was to press fn+F6. That will turn my laptop's monitor off instantly. It allowed me to hide from my lecturer that i had been gaming during his class.

Well enough of lectures. After i was dismissed. I went to SP(Singapore Polytechnic). It was something planned not too long ago by Sin Yu and Hong Sheng. The 3 of us met up with Derrick on 3 different times with me being the first, Sin Yu second and Hong Sheng, last, due to his attachment. Well the wait for those two was long and the only way to keep myself awake was to play more games and my head felt heavier as every second went by.

Some may think "why work so late at night in the first place?" but hey, I will tell them it is sort of the peak hour for my brain. I work better in the night although it can be quite taxing.

Well enough talk about working in night. Soon after Hong Sheng met up with all of us, we get to know a sad news but let's not talk about it. Around 7.00pm We took a small walk around then we sat down somewhere to observe SP Taekwondo's training. No comments on the training as i am in no place to do it. Not long after observing the training, i started to doze off. Real bad, i lost awareness of my surroundings. That led to us leaving much earlier than expected. Oh well... If only i slept earlier the previous night...

One last thing though. SP is a special place i will say. Although certain place seemed cramped up It actually has a good network of "bridges" and a lot of them One may get lost in SP if not careful. Its library really is a place for reading and relaxation no doubt.
Its quite late now... Sleep for me there is...

Past Memories

2007-07-06T10:01:00.000-07:00

In the previous post i wrote about my relatives and there were three of them that i have called best cousins from young till now. They are, Arron, Sheng Hao and Jia Hui. We did lots of things together, playing catching, jumping from the steps of a stair case etc. Let's introduce them to everyone.

First, its Arron. 4 years older than me. The tallest among all of us with his diet of cheese last time and having basketball as his favourite sport last time, he can be called a giant when standing beside us. He was the 1st within the four of us who is brave (or MAN) enough to jump eight steps from a set of HDB stair case. He had those awesome and fun Sega games which i would simply spend lots of time playing with. For some who do not know what Sega is, i am refering to an old game console. One of my old time favourites is Sonic the Hedgehog. Arron introduced it to the other three of us and we had fun time simply controlling a Hedgehog jumping around and spinning. Ah those were the times. However, as the years went by we started to see him less as he was much more busy to go out with his parents on those days when most of our relatives meet up...

Ok next is Sheng Hao. 4 years older than me. He may look like one normal person from first sight, but once you get to know him, you will find that he is actually a joker and someone who treats all his friends well. My first impression of him is Stephen Chow. He actually have a slight resemblance with that popular comedian. When we were younger, he would invent those games that would test the level of our endurance-to endure for a long time not to laugh while he spew out phrases that would make most of us laugh like no tomorrow. There would always be laughter with him around.

Lastly, It will be Jia Hui. 2 years older than me. The only female in our group. With her tomboy actions, we almost regarded her as a guy she like to play as leader to all of us. Following her command felt good as she was just and fair. One commander everyone will like. One significant memory i had with her was that she will buy those "Mamee" cracker noodles, crush them, and distribute among the other younger cousins(including me). Telling us to line up properly and wait for out turn to come. She hates wearing dresses and the time that i ever saw her wear one was when i was around 5-6 years old

Some of those past times we had was to have a race. Being the youngest in the group, i would always be the one to lag behind as the last in position. We played many games on many different game consoles together. Had many sleep overs in each other's house. ONe hobby we had was to explore many different neighbourhoods in search of playgrounds and play in those places. However, as time pass by. We started to see lesser of each other as everyone started to get more and more busy. It was same as what Sheng Hao had said to me, "Ah Hao, we may be having fun now. Treasure these times because, when the time comes, we will be too busy to meet up as a group anymore. There will not be sleep overs, search for playgrounds or gaming. We will meet each other lesser." Reality catches up pretty quickly and i had no time to react to that kind of life. Life which Sheng Hao had described. Being a human, i adapted to that kind of life quickly but i shall never forget those times.

To me, they are the perfect role models who i aimed to be. Arron with his height and nice personality. Sheng Hao whose presence simply keeps people happy. Jia Hui, whose academic results are good. I wished to have a bit of every one of them. To be tall and nice, to be a presence of happiness and to fare well in my studies.

Time. Ever flowing. As it flows, many changes takes place everyday. It can bring many people together and separate them. Time and tide waits for no man as one will say. Do not waste time doing nothing. Spend more times with those whom you like and treasure those times.

I sure miss those time i had with the three of them. With that, i have a simple wish. that is to relive those fun times we have as group just once more would be enough for me...

Trust

2007-06-30T10:32:00.000-07:00

After going home from Sin Yu's Sister's Birthday party, i learnt a lot of things. Things about Both Sin Yu and Hong Sheng. Their family, and some sensitive topics.

After listening what they had said about their family and relatives, i felt that i am a lucky one. I grow up in a world where everyone treats each other well. No scheming or evil Uncles or Aunts. Only naughty cousins. Every one simply live and catch up with each other's life's happenings. The only difference from now is that, it was much more lively last time when everyone was not as busy as now. In the old times, laughters could be heard in quite a distance. Loud voices of my aunts including my mother simply passed their time talking and playing their Mahjong. The uncles, talking about business, politics, work etc. While i, as a kid, would just play around with other cousins without any worries. I miss those days and sure do wish to revive those days.

I may dislike certain relatives of mine for some reasons but i never hated them. In Sin Yu's case, he hated some of his relative due to the way they treat his family. If i were to stand in his shoes, i would have confronted those people and gave them a piece of my mind. Hong Sheng's case reminds me of the bond i have with my father's side of relatives. the way people labels us as someone's son and totally forget about us next time. They will never care what happens to us except for the fact that we are the sons of our fathers fullstop. My life is better In the sense that i have relatives(Mother Side) that truly care.

Enough of comparisons. The main purpose of this post is about trust. To be able to talk so many sensitive topics in front of some friends(including me) like that. Sin Yu and Hong Sheng really put a lot of trust into those friends. I do not ever wish to betray those trusts and i will share some of my special experiences to them as well, to them. That is my way of showing them that i trust them.

Trust, also known as the bond between people, is hardest to build up and easiest to break. Once broken, it may not be as strong as before and stay that way or it may be rebuilt and emerge stronger. As we live on together, our bonds strengthen. One day they may be strengthen to the point where nothing can break it. That is when true friendships or love exists. It is not that those things do not exists. It is just that many did not try hard or long enough to find them.

Kids, Happiness, Fun

2007-06-25T04:14:00.000-07:00

The day before this day i blogged was a Sunday. Every Sunday is the day my nephew(Alfred) returns home to his parents. I kind of missed him everytime he went home. The house suddenly became so quiet for two whole days. The laughters and the way he called me "AO! AO!". Some even thought i am his father for the way i treat him but hey, could they not see that i am still young?

Alfred's birthday is just a few days later and it shall be his second birthday. With that, he is only a few years from the hellish pranks which are to be set by me. Although i treat all kids nicely, there is something i always like to do. That is to do pranks on kids and see how they would react. I even cheat when playing games with them and amazingly, they learn from those things and gets to trick me once in awhile especially my younger brother. Clever people they are they just learn fast.

I always had a lot of fun playing with the kids. I think it should be defined as entertaining and relaxing. The way their laughters simply bring all bad or sad things away from the mind. It can also be a nice workout which is not bad.

In Concord Primary, when teaching the naughty students there taekwondo, it may looked as though i had overdid my scolding or whatever but everytime i find an "example" for punishment, it had always been a different person, other than that stubbornly mischievous yellow tip. For some people, stubborn not does mean stupid, it means hard-headed and people who are hard headed is very hard to convince to do something and for that yellow tip's case, its hard for him to learn to be good. Patience is the only key to doing it and i hope i am successful in doing it.

How special kids can be. Their smiles and laughter can bring sorrows away. They can grow up the be the best with the correct way of nurturing. I ever thought of becoming a teacher but thinking about my lazy and carefree nature, its somehting which can never be achieved unless i work harder.

I think some people even hates kids but hey, you were once a kid your and there were times when you were hated by those who are adults now. Kids are to be treated with equality and justice, but not in a systematic way. Every kid has his own nature just as everyday has its own happenings. The methods of teaching kids are changing everyday and every generation. Staying the same will never help. Just like walking your own path everyday. The moment you stop moving may be the moment you stop living.

Weird Feelings

2007-06-22T09:51:00.000-07:00

Night Cycling

Wednesday 20 June 2007 was the my first ever cycling trip. Ok bad experiences should mostly be thrown into the wilds so let's not mention those things. Lets get on with the normal post about the happy times. In that trip, i finally get to cycle long distances for the third time, i could not believe i had that feeling as i hated cycling. Why? Its all because of that little sister of mine who kept showing off that she knew how to ride a bike in front of me while i was just that "Mama's" Boy still clinging onto my mother not wanting to learn anything "Dangerous" while i did not know how to ride one. However, now its different.

For the trip, the whole big company(the primers people baby) was split into groups the groups had to follow the route(East Coast Part to Changi Village and back again) which was set before the day of the event. Among that route lies some stops for some short games. It was a happy experience for me as some of those wacky games i thought of actually were fun to people. It could be known from all those laughters i head from the different groups. Too bad... I had to leave early for my 2nd trip to Malaysia this holiday but overall, it was nothing but fun for me...

The Past, Present and Future

My second trip to Malaysia is to Genting with my younger brother and my older brother with his family. Yes it is my second time to Genting. This time, to try as many rides in one day. When we reached the indoor theme park and took a walk around the place, i had some flashbacks... The memories i had of those time i went there with the Taekwondo people and along with those flashbacks, someone's face kept flashing by my head.

During the whole of that second trip, i could not help but kept comparing it with the 1st one. I that freaking feeling i had when having those thoughts. My suggestion is that,when going overseas with a company, it is better not to go to the same place twice unless you are sure you will not compare the difference in feelings you had in those two trips. For example, the feeling of fun with good friends alongside you, the feeling of loneliness when you go out with a much smaller groups without those good friends around.

Although all i did was simply look at the backs of them most of the time. Friends' presence was enough to make me feel comfortable. For going out with family, i had that safe feeling when i was travelling around them. Some part of me wanted to compare these two feelings i had for those trips but it is not possible as those are two totally different feelings...

Soon after we checked in, we went to get the entrance tags for indoor and outdoor play and the first place for me to go was to the SpaceShot ride which is located in the outdoor section of the theme park. While queueing up, i called Ray who was also suppose to be having fun around the theme park during that time.

Oh yes one thing to bring up before going on... I had promised to take the ride with Charmaine before but due to the wet weather last time, we did not get to ride... Sorry for going up without you.(LOL) One can say Space Shot is thrilling for me and too bad, scary for my younger brother. Not long after my first try, it was my older brother's turn he also hjad fun going up and down in that ride. Once my elder brother had finished with his ride, Ray came with his cousin at the right time and we queued up for the ride again. To me, the second time was not much of a thrill anymore and once we were done with it, it started to rain heavily and there was no more outdoor theme park for me anymore......(An i only had 2 rides... 2 Space Shot rides...)

The remaining time for that whole day was to walk around and play in the indoor theme park. The second day was almost no different than the "walk around and play in indoor theme park" in the first day but hey, it was fun to take Space Shot and to take it with my best friend Ray.

My way of life

I love to look back at old times i had with everyone but
i hate to look back and regret.
I tend to waste memory space in my brain for remembering those times instead of use them for proper studies.
I like keep the bad memories in my head to learn valuable lessons from those mistakes i had made in the past and not to look back and cry.
This is how i live.
This is my way of life......

1st Post

2007-06-19T19:51:00.000-07:00

Hmm as there are still nothing much for me to write. I shall write things from the tkd trip i guess.

1st DAY

The alarm i set did not wake me up. Time was of the essence for me as there were not enough of it for me to do my usual morning clean up. Next thing was to rush up to Lot1 to meet up with the company(Sin Yu, Hong Sheng, Ernest, Kang Wei and Jerina).

By the time i reach, it was 7.31am. Not long after, the tansport arrived. However, Yan Shun was nowhere in sight. He was suppose to meet everyone at Lot1 too.

While in the transport, i noticed some familiar faces. Mr Lee, Cherie and 4 girls from Yang Zhen. Mr Lee then suggested that we set off to Woodlands 1st and try to contact Yan Shun on the way. As soon as the transport started moving, most of us tried to contact Yan Shun but all our calls were unanswered. Next we called his home only to find out that his passport was not extended. We had no choice but to leave him behind.

After some time through the customs and so, we arrived in JB around 8.40am+, the atmosphere was different compared to Singapore's. One assumption i can make is that Singapore looked much cleaner. Ok back to the subject.

Our 1st destination was to go to a small coffee shop to try out the Bak kut teh there. However, it would only be ready at 10am. We decided not to wait and moved to another place to have out breakfast. I was seated near those YZ girls and came to know half boiled eggs they had order for breakfast were not boiled long enough. In the end, none of the eggs were even consumed. I salute them for trying that which i did not dare to order. Did i mention that the Lemon juice or what ever it is that i had makes one's mouth feel dry?

Straight after our breakfast, we set off for KL to our hotel. The whole ride was a taxing one. It's not the first time i had this kind of long ride. I wonder how it feels to be the driver then.

After long hours of travelling and having one pit stop ne the way. We finally arrived at Hotel Malaya, the place where we will stay in. After some time of settling down, we went to a shopping centre. After the shopping centre trip we rested abit and went down to the China Town, which is located at the street the hotel is in to do some shopping. After the shopping, we went back to our rooms, clean up a little and some of us gathered in Mr Lee's room to play cards while he did his own things like checking if everyone is alright and clarifying certain things.

After playing for some time, some of us felt sleepy and went back to our respective rooms and have our rest while waiting for the second day to come.

2nd DAY

We went to Batu cave to have training with Malaysia's national team. As classified information should not be reveal i shall be brief. It's mostly climbing of stairs until most of us could not even handle and gave up half way. The stairs have around 260 steps if i did not remember wrongly. It's like climbing 15 stories in Singapore's average HDB flats if someone were to climb to the top.
Some people may say Malaysian nationals are crazy but compare us with the world, its us who do not have enough discipline in training and that Singaporeans are overly protected.

Soon after that taxing training, we went back to our hotel again for yet another clean up. Let's talk about the actual plan for day 2. After the morning training, we were suppose to rest the whole day doing whatever we like for the whole afternoon and go for another training in the evening. However, Mr Lee decided to have us go to Genting Highlands since we be having nothing to do in the day. When we reached Genting, we split into 3 groups. Mr Lee's group which consist of(Mr Lee himself, Uncle Chai the driver and Sin yu), The funland group(Ernest, Hong Sheng, Cherie, Mandy, Charmaine, Queenie, Charlene and me). Last group consist of Kang Wei and Jerina thats all.

After we split, we(the funland group) wanted to go to the outdoors ride section to let hell loose but, due to bad weather conditions, most rides were suspended or stopped. So we have to waste some time by doing some shopping with the girls. During the mindless walk(for guys that is) Hong Sheng and i actually found what we wanted and we bought those things(One dog plushie each). After some long shopping, We went back to check out the rides. YES the rides are available but time was not on our side. To pay for entry but not to be able to play to our fill, is like a waste of money so we decided to take one ride only. The Flying Coaster...
Ernest and Charlene decided to sit out for that ride. During the ride, I screamed and laughed like a wild Hyena.(Its for the motion sickness i had while riding that transport up the highland).
After the ride, we went to Starbucks cafe for a break while waiting for everyone since its is almost the Meeting time.

After we meet up , we went off to have our second training with Malaysia Nationals. Well during the training, i founf out that skipping(with the skipping rope) is a good training. Unfortunately, I do not know how to skip and had to spend the whole training time on skipping ropes trying to get my rhythm while the other guys do their training and the girls doing their back thrusts.

With the training finished we went off for dinner and another clean up for the night. Next it's another gathering in Mr Lee's room playing cards while Mr Lee took his much needed rest. We played until 4am and Ernest and i went back to our room as i was sleepy. End of day 2.

3rd DAY

Due to the lack of sleep the previous day, i stuck to my bed for a long time but hey even after i woke up and done my morning clean up, most of the company were still asleep. Well, after taking breakfast, we went to a temple nearby to look around. The others did some catching up with each other while Mr Lee, Hong Sheng and me did some praying. All i did was pray for everyone's safety(LOL). After that, we went to a chocolate store which sells many kinds of chocolate. I bought some stuff and we set off to the China Town in Malacca. After that, Its the long trip back to JB again.

Most of us got knocked out due to the exhaustion we all had except for Queenie the ultimate survivor!!! She is the only one who did not sleep much in the transport or maybe never even slept inside the transport for all the rides. Well, enough of that...

After we reached JB at the night we went to a seafood reataurant for our dinner. We set off for Singapore straight after the dinner. When we were at Malaysia's side of a customs, there was this guy who literally laugh out loud in that already crowded and small room. Unable to contain his wild side, Sin Yu laughed out Loudly back at that guy Which was answered with another laughter from that same person. Having the urge to join in that fun, I too did what the 2 had done. Well, after all that, we were drove to Lot1 where Ernest, Sin Yu, Hong Sheng Kang Wei, Jerina and me dropped off and headed home...

END OF TRIP

Such a fun trip i had. The YZ girls have beautifl smiles, I hope to bring a camera next time and take a snap of those smiles.